Metamorphosis with Katie Valentine: From facing your deepest shadows to a ‘f**k yes!’ life

Katie Valentine

Have you ever felt trapped by the expectations of others of what constitutes a successful life? Shrugged your shoulders at the traditional family model of ‘spouse and sprogs’? Had a vision of your future that thrilled you beyond belief, but felt too ridiculous to speak out loud?

Then this one’s for you.

This interview is very special to me – and I hope it will be valuable to many others. It is also very long. Much longer than any content guidelines for a TikTok audience would recommend – but those are not my people.

I didn’t want to edit out a single paragraph of this article because it tells the story of one of the most relentlessly courageous, authentic and inspiring women I have ever encountered. And I’ll be damned if I shorten it and lose too many of her beautiful words. I am convinced that the people who, like me, are looking for something true in a world of fake news, will read the. whole. damn. thing.

Take a little time for yourself, make a cup of tea or pour a glass of wine, sit back and enjoy!

Katie and I worked and lived together one crazy, hectic summer in Ibiza many moons ago. After the season finished, we stayed connected over social media and, as Katie began to post her first blogs, poems and articles, I was captivated by the raw yet poetic way she had with words.

As my own life became increasingly dominated by demanding freelance work, the island’s unforgiving seasonal schedule and my inability to say ‘no’, I became glued to Katie’s stories. I enjoyed living vicariously through the candid posts that detailed her Barcelona fairytale, bucket list trips to Italy and Turkey, and solo dates on which she would thoroughly spoil herself.

One of my favourite phrases of Katie’s remains, “nobody treats Katie like Katie does.” 

Yet, she was never bragging. Amidst Instagram’s culture of showing off, Katie, to this day, is blisteringly honest about her insecurities, triggers and traumas. She shares the lows, the sometimes torturous work of facing your inner demons, and the magic that lies on the other side of it. 

This, in my opinion, is what sets her apart from other coaches and mentors. It keeps her relatable, and it is exactly why I want everyone questioning their place in this world to know about her.

Long before I knew the word ‘expander’, Katie became an instrumental person in up-levelling my own vision of what life could be like, planting little seeds of possibility in my mind through her posts. 

Fast forward to the Covid-19 pandemic. What became a life-changing moment in history for so many people finally set Katie on her true soul path of helping others. Read on and allow yourself to be mesmerised by her incredible journey as told in her inimitable, heartfelt way.

So… ONE MORE TIME FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK!

If you have ever felt called to follow a life path less ordinary, shed the self-imposed shackles holding you back from becoming the truest expression of yourself, to create a reality that has you jumping out of bed in the morning rather than hitting the snooze button… this one’s for YOU! 

Katie and Olivia worked together in Ibiza in 2016.

DJ, producer, writer, sound healer, and mentor – who also creates meditations, hypnosis sessions AND workshops – you reach so many people in so many different ways. How would YOU describe your purpose?

Wow, is that really me? Hahaha! It’s sooooo difficult to explain what I do in a couple of words, especially when I meet new people. 

Recently, after a DJ gig in Brussels, I was immersed in a five-hour conversation with a beautiful stranger and he asked me, ‘What do you believe is your mission on this earth and how are you pursuing it?’

I love that he used the word ‘mission’ rather than ‘purpose’. Personally, I like to use the word ‘passion.’

Finding my ‘purpose’ wasn’t some fairytale journey where I woke up one morning and said, ‘THIS is what I am meant to be doing with my life. HALLELUJAH.’

My journey to my purpose nearly killed me. It is a culmination of all the fires I have walked myself through, from attempted suicide to bulimia and addiction to alchemizing my pain into something tangible that can help others.

Two powerful tools that you use to express yourself are sound and words…

Through playing music and sound therapy, it is my responsibility to take care of the parasympathetic nervous systems of the people in front of me – and I take that very seriously.

Our ears are connected to every organ in our body, including our heart and our brain. Through sound (whether it be in a club or a sound therapy session), I have the ability to unlock something in others. To allow them to rest and digest, to feel something, to give them a release, to leave them better than I found them.

I believe words are just as powerful as music. I started writing about my experiences around seven years ago when I spontaneously sold my whole life in Australia to move to Barcelona. I was having these deep internal experiences and going through the motions that come with uprooting your whole life to a new country, and trying out an entirely new identity.

The only way I knew how to transmute what the f**k was happening to me was through writing, and it started to resonate with people.

I believe that by facing the darkest, scariest depths of myself, I have become a more inspiring, loving and present human being. That is the beauty of this work. Who you become in the process.

When you find your passion, and you get to share that passion with others and ignite something in them? Holy f**k, that is a connection of the highest divine order – it is absolutely unexplainable.

So, in conclusion, I believe my mission is to leave everyone better than I found them.

From selling your belongings to move from Oz to Europe to building a new business from the ground up in lockdown, please share your incredible backstory with our readers…

In 2016, at 26 years old, I had ‘the perfect life’: The perfect apartment, and a calendar full of well-paid DJ gigs. But I also had extreme bulimia, crippling anxiety, and depression. The Australian healthcare system had put me on antidepressants for my gluten intolerance (to ‘make my gut happy’!!) and I lost an entire year of my life.

I genuinely don’t remember anything. During this time I had to have my groceries delivered because I was so paranoid about bright places and the way I looked; I couldn’t leave the house without spending hours doing my hair and makeup. I sat in therapists’ and doctors’ offices with a facetuned photo of myself begging them to make me look a particular way. Due to some trauma I had avoided and stuffed down with food, I had grown up into an unregulated mess – and no one knew what to do with me.

One morning I came home from a weekend of music that sucked the life out of me and said, ‘f**k this’.

I sold all the bulls**t designer clothes I’d bought to impress people I didn’t even really like, my music studio and furniture, flushed my sim card down the toilet, and jumped on a plane to Barcelona with nothing but a suitcase. What was scarier than going to Barcelona was not going to Barcelona, losing more teeth from my eating disorder, and going deeper into the depths of the comfortable mess I had created for myself.

I changed my DJ name and went from making $2000 a week to 50€ covering my weekly groceries to play music I love in small parties and bars. I went from a one-bedroom bougie apartment with a terrace next to Chapel Street to a shitty little sweatbox room in Barceloneta Beach that couldn’t even fit my clothes.

Amongst the streets of Barcelona with nothing but 20€ in my back pocket, I had never felt more alive. It took me almost four years to build myself back up as a DJ, I ran out of money twice and had to go back to Australia with my tail in between my legs, reduced to one instinct. ‘Make money. Get back to Europe where you belong.’

And then, the world changed…

When Covid hit, I lost my ten-year identity as a DJ. I was drinking wine for breakfast and eating cereal for dinner. Days were turning into weeks. I was in and out of hospital with a cyst on my ovary. It was the death of all I had ever known.

All I had was three sound bowls. A couple of hundred Euros to my name. An apartment to myself I had no idea how I was going to afford. And an internet connection.

I began to realise I do not fit into anywhere and began to cut a groove for myself – it was no longer an option for me to hide. But, in order to do so, I first had to face my own inner demons. My deep fear of forever being an outsider was the very thing that was holding me back from becoming a leader.

I decided to disappear and go deep into my cocoon, and by doing so, I emerged as the big breath of fresh air I was destined to be in this world.

Katie Valentine DJ
Katie playing a set in Brisbane, Australia.

What were the first steps of your own metamorphosis?

With what little money I had coming in, I booked sessions with mentors and healers who embodied what I wanted to be. People who triggered me. People I was envious of. 

Envy made me curious. I educated myself with courses, documentaries and books until my mission became so damn imprinted in my brain that people could question me all they wanted; I had something they didn’t have.

I had a Ph.D. in darkness; something you couldn’t buy in courses and documentaries and books. I had gone ‘down there’ and I survived to tell the tale. I began to only care about my own opinion, and whether that was healing others, too.

After that, I wrote a zine about my deepest scariest shadows and published it on Amazon. It was f**ing vulnerable & scary.

I did sound healings on Instagram live every Sunday and f**ked up. I f**ked up and tripped over myself again and again until it felt natural.

Fast forward to three years later and my pain has become my purpose – and my signature programme.

There was beauty in the breakdown. Purpose of the lockdown. A butterfly emerging from metamorphosis. A Phoenix rising from the ashes.

Oh, if that girl could have had a ten-second glimpse into what her life is like now! Because she kept showing up, even on the days it hurt the most. In the darkest depths of my despair, I soldiered on.

I believed in something / someone bigger than myself. And then I pushed up my sleeves and I went out and f**king became her.

How did you first hear about manifestation, shadow work and alternative therapies – and what were your first experiences with these tools?

I had bulimia for three and a half years. 

I tried everything to get rid of it, but like any addiction, I kept relapsing. I lost three teeth, got myself into quite a bit of debt from overeating, and was convinced I would have this disease for the rest of my life.

One morning I woke up after a blackout and looked at the path of destruction I had left behind – at this point I was throwing up three times a day. I said, ‘Holy s**t, if I don’t do something I am literally going to die.’

I typed ‘How can I fix myself, FAST!’ and hypnotherapy came up on Google. I sat out in the gutter and had a discovery call with a Barcelona-based hypnotherapist (Ryan Jenkins, who is now my closest friend, and co-healer in the online programme I designed called “Metamorphosis”) and cried down the phone.

He unlocked a whole new world of possibility for me, one far beyond the ‘talk therapy’ and medication the Western doctors had led me to. Within four sessions, I never put my fingers down my throat again (five years free, baby!!!).

During Covid, I discovered inner child and shadow work. As I started to go deeper into my subconscious and face all of the parts of myself I had buried with food, alcohol, and men for decades, I ultimately up-levelled my self-esteem and worth.

I then began to play with manifestation. And thus, I discovered the beautiful art of manifesting my desires by doing the dark, dirty work that made me believe I couldn’t have them.

Since then I have been on a CRAZY journey calling in the exact life I lead now.

Bali played a big part in your transformation…

One morning I woke up with an awful feeling in my stomach that Lisbon (where I lived at the time) was going into a second lockdown. I booked a flight to Bali, put everything in storage, and jumped on a flight. Three days later Portugal went into an extreme lockdown that lasted months.

After a series of unfortunate fortunate events, I manifested a beautiful villa and locked myself in there for months studying and bringing my business to life. I did sessions by donation, which ultimately led to creating my signature coaching programme, “Metamorphosis”.

How lucky I was to live on that island during a pandemic, to have access to the world’s greatest, most authentic, bulls**t-free healers, and face myself. I went into a cocoon of healing, and I went to WAR with the darkest parts of myself. I stayed celibate and mostly sober for seven months; I felt I emerged as this completely new butterfly.

I developed a deep connection with the higher intelligence that exists within all of us. My intuition.

Since then, my life has been an adventure. I followed my intuition back to Barcelona and created a brand new life from scratch for the seventh time over. A life that blows my hair back, a life that I am so f**king excited to wake up to every day.

Bali
Bali is where Katie’s own healing journey began in earnest.

You are very open about your own challenges, heartache, insecurities, and desires. How do you find the courage?

You can’t imagine how many times I have posted a blog, story or an article for Elephant Journal (and their 23 million readers) and thrown my phone across the room!

I still sometimes wake up in the middle of the night in a panic about something vulnerable I have posted on the internet. Let me tell you, The Fear never, ever goes away. But the more we put our true, vulnerable selves out there, the braver we become.

When we connect with our mission and ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to not post this? To withhold information that could change just ONE life today?’, we hang up our ego and allow the heart to connect with the soul and do its most selfless work.

I once submitted a poem called ‘A Love Letter to the Red Wine, Howl at the Moon, No f**ks Given Women’ to Elephant Journal. They had rejected six of my other poems, so I never imagined they’d publish this one. When they did, I had a MELTDOWN emailing them asking them to remove it. But it was already out there, and guess what? It went viral, and I won an award. 

This showed my subconscious mind that I would not be culled from society if I put my deepest and scariest thoughts out there. Quite the opposite, actually. I had people in the music industry who once ridiculed me for being extroverted come and share their vulnerabilities with me.

Going to war with myself and slapping pieces of my soul all over the internet has opened me up to deeper and more authentic connections with people I may never have never connected with in passing.

You are equally as candid on your Instagram Stories, and we love you for your honesty! 

I love to share my process and behind-the-scenes in my Metamorphosis Membership Space. The experiences I am having right now are deeply symbolic. Deeply kismet. I am overwhelmed with all the newness yet calm and in deep peace. I want to express everything I am feeling and this community is where I do it.

In a TikTok ‘viral’ world, where everyone pretends their life is so perfect on social media, to have someone relatable like me being honest when I am GOING THROUGH IT whilst showing you all the magic that comes after a period of facing yourself, of going one layer deeper, is connected to my mission – and I will continue to overshare and cringe at myself and wake up in the middle of the night with a vulnerability hangover for as long as I live!

You are an experienced manifestor by now and have held masterclasses on this topic. How would you describe the process to someone who is new to the subject?

So many coaches out there are marketing themselves as having some kind of ‘secret code to the universe’ that you don’t have. But the fastest way to manifest what you want is to BE YOUR TRUE AUTHENTIC SELF. What does that look like?

My most powerful manifestation of them all? Myself.

I moulded, shaped, reprogrammed, and dreamed this human into being. The physical world has finally caught up to all the internal work I have done to become ‘Katie Valentine IOS 8.8’.

Better features.
Profound clarity.
Lightning quick manifestations.
Faster intuition.
Upgraded bullshit detector.
Higher storage space for joy.

And I get to wake up and be her every day for the rest of my life!!!

‘My most powerful manifestation of them all? Myself.’

In your programme “Metamorphosis” you also look into Human Design. For the uninitiated, what is it and how does it affect our daily life?

I could go on for hours about Human Design and how much it has changed my life and the way I operate. But I have ranted on enough in this interview and you guys have Google 😉 although I highly suggest having a reading from a professional.

Human Design shines a light on how you operate, manifest, digest, love, and bring what you desire into your life. Astrology describes the conditions, but Human Design describes your mission, and who you are at a soul level.

I love watching the sigh of relief pour over my clients as I give them PERMISSION to be who they are, that what they perceive as weaknesses when acknowledged and transmuted in a healthy way can become their biggest STRENGTHS.

It is an eternal rabbit hole, but a journey worth embarking on nonetheless.

Relationships! I messaged you a while ago to say that it’s amazing to see how much you have grown and put in the work to love yourself so much that you would always choose yourself above anything and anyone else. How has the journey to such deep self-worth been for you?

My Chiron and deepest wound on this earth has been the belief that ‘I am not enough’. I have spent most of my life in spaces, not present, questioning every word that crosses my lips; whether I am beautiful enough.

There is NO destination called ‘enough’.

It is an inside job. Something you must water and work on every day.

There is nothing more important in this world than for you to feel joy and to feel worthy. Think about it… It is in the best interests of both yourself and those around you if you have more self confidence.

Self confidence and self awareness are the best things you can achieve for yourself. No matter how much you try, you will never be able to make other people happy if you aren’t satisfied with yourself first. It’s really that easy.

In order to achieve any form of success, you must have faith in yourself.

Something that many people find very scary is to let go of something that we have outgrown or where our needs aren’t fully met. How important is it, as you grow and uplevel, not to settle? To face the fear and do it anyway?

Until recently, I had been in a safe relationship for two years, where I never had to question my lovability or ‘enoughness’. 

I lived half the time in Cannes on the French Riviera (a dream for a little Australian girl) and we created a really beautiful life together, but there was an inner niggle, something telling me, ‘This is not for you. You are not monogamous.’

How the hell was I meant to walk away from all that stability and security? There was nothing wrong with my partner, in fact, he was quite perfect. But I had evolved, and I needed to spread my wings and call in experiences that would get me to the next level of evolution.

I made a really fucking hard and scary choice. I chose to walk away from my safe relationship in the pursuit of something bigger, and more aligned. By doing so, I jumped into a bottomless void with no life raft and scared the absolute s**t out of myself. I tripped over myself down the landscape full of possibilities that lay before me.

Since I made that decision, my whole life has turned around. I signified to the universe that I would not settle for safety and security, and that I had deep trust in the vision I had for myself. Within two months, I called in BIG, cracked-open experiences that led me to heal my codependency wound; a wound I needed to face and integrate before I hit the JACKPOT.

Two of my biggest dreams are about to come true, I have called in beautiful men who are in alignment and I just sold out another “Metamorphosis” programme!

To know how to surrender, to fall back into something as wide and as wavering as the universe when you thought you wouldn’t make it out alive is truly the most wonderful treasure I have discovered on this journey of mine.

When we don’t trust that we will be supported we stay stuck, stuck in a life that is not aligned or ‘sort of kind of’ looks like what we want, but we are too afraid to walk away.

I have learned to surrender to the fire of transformation and the art of alchemizing my pain.

When we view everyone as a lesson and a step along our journey back to our most authentic selves, life becomes this big fun game!

‘Do not disturb’. The Amalfi Coast is the place where Katie escapes to reconnect with her truest self.

We also have to talk about your fabulous solo trips, taking yourself on dates and writing holidays. How important is it for all of us to do something good for ourselves? 

It is only in retrospect we truly capture the golden nuggets of wisdom that were being dangled right in front of us all along.

Solo travel is how I dissect my life. And put the Humpty Dumpty of my discombobulated soul back together again. It is how I reinvent myself over and over and over.

After my breakup, I jumped on a plane to the Amalfi Coast and hiked The Path of Gods in silence and on mushrooms. This is how I was able to alchemize all that I had learned and integrate it the best way I knew how.

Only in silence can you hear the voice that does not speak. 

I have never written a single word worth sharing or an idea worth pursuing sitting in front of my laptop forcing myself to create. They pour through me when I am out there in the world immersed in new humans. New streets. New aesthetics. New art. New lovers.

I think you can point anywhere on the map and say ‘this is where I belong’ regardless of what was originally ‘your home’. After over two decades of fighting the wild inside of me in the confinements of Australia, I am so very lucky to have found two places on this little blue and green dot in which my soul feels a deep sense of belonging.

The streets of Barcelona, and, wherever I lay my head at night in whatever city I am in Italy.

In Italy, I can do the one thing I do not know how to do anywhere else. Nothing. Absolutely f**king nothing. 

Without WhatsApp or voice notes or Instagram or emails or whatever the f**k, I start to reconnect with my senses. 

The sound of the stream outside my window as my ‘heart attack’ coffee squeals in the perculator. The smell of the lemons in the trees next to my writing chair and the random dog I have adopted as my own. The feeling of REAL EARTH beneath my feet as I walk to harvest tomatoes from the garden for my dinner, not a supermarket in sight, so I’m hustling a local for mozzarella and pesto and a bottle of homemade fizzy wine. The simplicity of pasta made with the soul of flirty Italian chefs who will never tire of telling you that a beautiful woman deserves beautiful food.

The view of the Amalfi coast hits me in the stomach and brings me to tears as I hike three hours uphill, remembering to look back to see how far I have come. Here is where I live my dream of going to bed with the sunset and waking up with the sunrise. Covered head to toe in olive oil.

Waking up in my little one-bedroom in the middle of nowhere looking over the Amalfi coast. I turn feral against the norms of society and city life. I find ‘my wild’ once again.

I hope you find somewhere on this earth that makes you feel like home. A place that tests you, ignites you, f**ks with you, and holds you. Somewhere that makes you remember your wild.

You are working on a series of novels and also a TV show. Can you tell us about the story you’re telling, what the challenges are, and how you are dealing with them?

My core mission in producing these novels and this series is to show my journey to empowerment. My journey from this f**ked up, depressed and anxious Australian girl who looked everywhere for a home outside of herself, to eventually, after many quests, rock bottoms and hero journeys, found home within herself.

The core message of each project intertwines with each other and this is what keeps them ignited within me. But let me tell you, it is sooooo overwhelming.

I have a series mentor with 10 years of experience in the film industry helping me turn my novel into a script. At first, I was terrified. Ran away to the Amalfi Coast to write in an Airbnb for three days, and I just couldn’t do it.

I paced around that room for two days, terrified of writing the first sentence, eventually passing out from the exhaustion that comes from resisting something deep within you that wants to be birthed.

Eventually, I fought through and today, three months later, I am on the final scene of my pilot. Something that was inconceivable has become a reality thanks to perseverance and a mentor behind me lighting the way.

Last year in January, I sat down with my intentions for the year. I had all these ideas brewing within me, but no idea how to execute them. I remember getting on my knees in my Airbnb in Mexico City on the 2nd of January and saying, ‘Please universe, send me the right blogs, mentors, podcasts, tools, ANY information that will get me to the next step. I have no f**king idea what I am doing’.

Within six months I had found an editor who has helped me refine my journey, suck out all the ‘woe is me’ ego and victim mentality of my first draft, and a book coach who has helped me redefine my story into a novel that will serve my readers.

You work with a variety of different coaches. How important is it to have these mentors, and how do you find the right one for you?

Oh, I have been on an absolute rollercoaster with mentors and coaches.

During Covid, the industry boomed and it was very easy to get sucked up by all these coaches showing off their earnings all over Instagram. I hired one of these coaches last year and got caught on the hamster wheel of believing I constantly had to produce content and make money. With this coach, I had my FIRST failed launch of “Metamorphosis”.

Thankfully, I was able to reign it in and get back to what works for ME and my HUMAN DESIGN, and how I am DESIGNED to operate in business.

Finding the right mentor for you, I believe you must ask yourself a series of questions. Is this person living a life I TRULY, AND AUTHENTICALLY, want for myself?

Here is something I have saved in my notes for when I am searching for the correct mentor or I am fearful about investing in myself. We are taught to invest in houses, cars, and material possessions, but when it comes to investing in ourselves we hold back.

‘Life is short, and your time for learning and creativity is limited. Without any guidance, you can waste valuable years trying to gain knowledge and practice from various sources. Instead, you must follow the example set by Masters throughout the ages and find the proper mentor.

‘The mentor-protégé relationship is the most efficient and productive form of learning. The right mentors know where to focus your attention and how to challenge you. Their knowledge and experience become yours. They provide immediate and realistic feedback on your work, so you can improve more rapidly.

‘Through an intense person-to-person interaction, you absorb a way of thinking that contains great power and can be adapted to your individual spirit. Choose the mentor who best fits your needs and connects to your Life’s Task.

‘Daily Law: Choosing the right mentor is like being able to choose your own parents; the wrong choice is fatal.’

Feeling the fear, but doing it anyway: Katie reading her poetry during an ‘open mic’ night in Barcelona.

You have fought hard to make Barcelona your home, and you often call it the love of your life. What is it about the city that resonates so much with you, and can you give us some insider tips for our next visit?

I get asked this question SO MUCH, even by strangers on the dancefloor, and I never quite have the answer.

I grew up in a city on the Gold Coast in Australia where I never felt like I belonged. In 2016 I came on a trip to Europe and Barcelona unintentionally became my base during those seven weeks.

There is something truly magic about living here. Barcelona isn’t easy to decipher, during seven years I have left four times to Ibiza, Berlin, Lisbon, and Bali. But I always come back to the wide open arms of this city with my tail in between my legs.

To really know Barcelona, you have to seduce it. You have to discover the heart of the city, where commotion and chaos are its pulse.
Picasso once said, ‘This is where it all began… Barcelona is where I understood how far I could go.’ This place has cracked me open to a whole new way of living.

Here is my list of all the best bars and restaurants my ex (a massive foodie) and I have collaborated on. The crème de la crème.

I could keep going forever with questions, but to bring it all together… Where can people find you, how can they work with you, and what’s next for the marvellous Katie Valentine?

At this point, I have absolutely no idea. My life is forever changing, forever evolving. And every time I try to make plans the universe laughs and sets me on a new path, always something bigger, better, and more ‘me’ than I could ever imagine!

I want for nothing right now in this moment and that feels really f**king cool to say out loud.
I know I will endure many more deaths and rebirths on this journey of mine, the art of alchemy. I now know that it is ALL a part of the plan.

The turmoil. The betrayal. The heartbreak. The endings. The beginnings.

I hope to find an agent who sees my vision for my books and my series, and what I want to do in this world.

I am about to release my first EP since before COVID on one of my favourite record labels. “Metamorphosis” has sold out for the seventh time, which means I have no space available to work with me until the end of October!

Everything truly feels like a possibility. Like it is within reach.

You can find me at the following:

METAMORPHOSIS MEMBERSHIP – A COMMUNITY OF GROWTH

INSTAGRAM

WORK WITH ME

I hope this interview has left you better than I found you.

SEE YOU IN THE HEART SPACE.

XX

More from Olivia Ebeling
Discovering Portugal: What To Do In Porto
‘Portugal – who knew?!’ must have been one of the most used...
Read More
0 replies on “Metamorphosis with Katie Valentine: From facing your deepest shadows to a ‘f**k yes!’ life”